Tommy Mitchell / The Rurban Church Blog

A Matter of Forgiveness - Part 3

Today let me deal with the heart of the difficulty of forgiveness.  When we extend forgiveness to someone it means we are willing to bear the pain of what others have done.  In the first part of  Matthew 18: 21 - 35, a desperate servant who could not pay his debt was marvelously forgiven.  Literally, his debt was canceled by the master who had come to take everything the servant had.  But moved by compassion, the master marvelously canceled the debt. 

This act on the part of the master meant that he would absorb the consequences of the unpaid debt.  He agreed in that moment to just bear the disappointment and frustration and let it go.  Be sure to understand that I don’t mean the master just agreed to be disappointed and angry or frustrated the rest of his life.  It is at the moment of forgiveness that you bear the pain of what another person has done. But then you let it go to the mercies and ministry of the Lord.  It is part of that “casting all your care upon the Lord!”  

What the master did for the servant is obviously a picture of what Christ did for us. He bore the pain of our sin. Even on the cross as others mocked Him, spit at Him, and hurled insults at Him, Christ said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do!” Luke 23:34. We tend to forget that forgiveness, while essential to a right relationship with God and with others, is also a painful thing.  There is a cost to forgiving. 

Sadly, our account of amazing forgiveness in the scripture does not end as well as it begins. Again, in Matthew 18:21 - 35 the forgiven servant, having had his debt canceled, went out and found a man who owed him a much smaller sum of money.  The servant demanded that the man pay him.  The servant attacked the man, and choked him. Though the debtor begged for mercy, and in spite of the fact that the servant had just had his own debt canceled, he went to the authorities and had the debtor thrown into prison.  What an amazing response from a man who was forgiven everything, who had his family spared, and who had his possessions restored to him.  The one who had been shown mercy and grace was now showing retribution and nastiness towards others.  

Well, you can certainly say the servant was unwilling to bear the pain of the actions of his debtor.  In the next part, we will examine the remainder of this scripture.   But notice this.  We have been forgiven EVERYTHING by the Lord. If you want to think about how much that is, try to remember for just about one minute the worse sins you have committed in your life - you know - the stuff you hope nobody ever finds out about.  Christ forgave us.  He bore the pain of our sins on the cross.  And not just the ones we hope nobody discovers - but all of them. Having been forgiven, and having Christ bear the pain of them, how could we then EVER be unforgiving, unwilling to bear the pain of the actions of another.  I think of how many times I have doubted God’s love, accused Him of not being there, and fussed at Him for His plans!  All sinful. Yet, He did not walk away. He forgave me.  He bore the pain of my faithlessness, hopelessness, and doubt. 

We cannot walk in a right relationship with the Lord if we are unwilling to pay the cost of forgiving others.  It will mean that for a little while, we will bear the pain of what another person has done, and we will release it to the Lord.  Bearing the pain and letting it go will become practically simultaneous as we walk and grow in our relationship with the Lord.  

My prayer is that I will be forgiving - that it will be my default position!  Most assuredly I have benefited greatly, not only from the Lord’s forgiveness, but from the forgiveness of others as well. 

 

 

 

A Matter of Forgiveness - Part 2

In my previous post (CLICK HERE FOR PART 1)  I introduced the topic of forgiveness.  Today, the Necessity of Forgiveness.

In Matthew 18:21 - 35 the passage begins with these verses. ²¹ Then Peter came to Him and said, “Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?”²² Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.

We simply must forgive.  At times we forgive people who ask us to forgive them.  But whether they ask or not, we are to forgive them.  The scripture asks the question of how often we should forgive when our brother sins against us.  The Lord’s reply of 70 times 7 does not mean 490 times.  The point of the multiplication is we forgive as often as we are offended.  To stay offended places us in the likely position of bitterness towards others and a growing bitterness in ourselves.  

The Lord followed these verses with a little illustration.  ³ Therefore the kingdom of heaven is like a certain king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. ²⁴ And when he had begun to settle accounts, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. ²⁵ But as he was not able to pay, his master commanded that he be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and that payment be made. ²⁶ The servant therefore fell down before him, saying, ‘Master, have patience with me, and I will pay you all.’ ²⁷ Then the master of that servant was moved with compassion, released him, and forgave him the debt.

The servant had a debt he could not pay.  The master had every right to take everything from him. The servant threw himself down and implored him for his help.  He cried out for patience.  The master was moved with COMPASSION  - He RELEASED the servant - HE FORGAVE THE DEBT!  

That means - he released him. He no longer held him responsible.  It was wiped clean.  How glorious. The Bible teaches us that God forgives us our sins and remembers them no more.  He removes our sins as far as the east is from the west.  Our sin, when forgiven, no longer has any influence over Him.  It is as if it never happened. 

When we forgive we must release it.  From a mere human perspective, we will always have memories of what has happened in our lives.  I suppose we actually might forget some of the circumstances we forgive over time.  But we certainly must make the commitment to release people from the debt of sin against us.  We must forgive - and forget so far as possible - and no longer allow wrongs against us, both perceived and real, to hold any sway against us.   

ON TOP OF THIS - if we all take the initiative in forgiving, then we will all be better off in our relationships.  It may or may not always be possible to have a conversation with people with whom we find ourselves at odds.  But we can always forgive. We can because Christ has forgiven us our debt which could never be paid from anything that we have. Christ took the initiative to forgive us, and so we must take the initiative to forgive others. 

It is not an easy thing - but it is certainly a blessing TO the forgiven - and to be forgiven.  

Imitating Chirst!

This past Sunday I preached on the topic of imitating Christ.  It really bugged me last week as I prepared for it.  Mainly, it made me think of all my interests and pursuits through the years.  Many of those interests and pursuits have been ministry related - some not.  The part that has bugged me is that I can not honestly say that I have always pursued Christ as vigorously as I have other things in my life - even good ministry things. 

If we are to truly be Christ's disciples, we MUST imitate Him.  That is not an abstract thing. We must imitate Him in His beliefs.  We must imitate His character.   We must imitate His ministry.  We must imitate His way in relationships.  And I could go on.   The demand on us to imitate Him is not negotiable.  Paul made the charge plain in 1 Corinthians 11:1 "Imitate me just as I also imitate Christ."

Do we pursue Him as much as fine gold?  Silver?  Ok - money?  Do we pursue Him as much as we do a great hunting spot?  Do we pursue Him as much as a fine buck?  Do we pursue Him as much as we do a great shopping expedition?  Do we pursue Him as much as fine clothes?  Do we pursue Him as much as we pursue position? Power? Possessions? 

G. K. Chesterton was the one who said, "Christianity has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found difficult and not tried."  The charge to imitate Christ can easily rally a few amens in the congregation on Sunday, but come Monday it is so easy to go all day without conforming my thoughts to His, my character to His, my beliefs to His, and so on.  

Without doubt, much, if not all the weakness in the modern American church scene can be attributed to a few generations of Christians who have done little to imitate Him.  To imitate Him, we must know Him, be drawn to Him, and to love Him more than life itself.   Somehow, that does not quite describe the church I have been acquainted with most of my life.

So, this is serious, but not hopeless. Repentance is needed on our end and rewarded by Christ. What has not been done in the past can be done from this day forward.  Oh for a church gathering together on the Lord's Day where we all look like, think like, sing like, praise like, obey like, and worship like Christ! 

Movie Critics All!!!!!

The last few weeks have been interesting to me.  I have watched, listened, and read as ministers and other prominent leaders in church ministry have turned into the Christian version of Siskel & Ebert!!! We (Christians) can watch this movie but probably not that one! We should know this one is fairly accurate and this one is not.  We should know that there are errors in this one and our faith might be destroyed if we watch it! Really???

Here are some things that I ponder! When I go see a movie produced by the secular entertainment media, I certainly put it through my own “moral” rating system.  I’m not going to go watch a “skin-flick!”  I’m not going to watch a movie where practically every word is vulgar!  This is not because my faith can’t handle it, it is because it is abhorrent to my faith.  Christ has changed my heart so I am careful with what I take in! 

That being said, I also go to a movie to be entertained!  When I watch a Star Trek movie, I don’t sit there exclaiming that warp drive does not exist in the real world!  When I watch “Top Gun” I don’t exclaim that the hero would have been court martialed for all his antics!   When I watch “The Hunt for Red October,” I don’t point out all the incredible military “non-realities!”  I go to be entertained.

So, now I have some people (my own kind – church folks) telling me it is ok to go see “God’s Not Dead” – but it is not ok to go see “Noah” – because “Noah” is not anywhere close to scripture!  Well, really, I did not think it would be. What movie, based on any scripture, has been totally accurate.  Even though “The Passion of the Christ” made a fair attempt to demonstrate the suffering Christ, I knew He suffered before I saw the movie.  I know that heaven is real even before a movie comes out that says it is.  I know that Noah built an ark and God destroyed the world with a flood no matter what the movie “Noah” purports itself to be. 

My question is this – how well do Christians know the word of God?  How strong are you in your faith?  Is your faith and witness unable to withstand the rough and tumble of this world?   And why are we so collectively easy to be offended at the lost, secular world?  People who are without Christ are going to act like they are without Christ!  And such were all of us before we came to know Christ! For many years Christians, instead of being powerful warriors and witnesses in the hands of God, have become holy huddlers – withdrawing from the world – hiding in our churches – scared that if we exercise, shop, entertain, and educate alongside the lost world our faith will be lost! Why?  Is our faith that weak? Is our knowledge that thin?  Are we really so weak and scared in our faith that one movie named “Noah” may rob us of all that is holy? 

So, what am I saying?  Go see these movies – don’t go see these movies!  That is up to you and the Holy Spirit living in you! Everyone can and should run that decision through their personal, spiritual buffers.  But don’t miss the opportunity to share the Gospel with people who may have their interest stirred in the spiritual through a secular movie! Don’t miss the opportunity to make friends among the unchurched at the gym. Don’t miss the opportunity to make friends among the unchurched at the ballfield.  Don’t miss the opportunity to build relationships with those who have no clue about the claims of Christ.  The American version of Christianity has a habit of getting all revved up over movies and such!  It is sad that we are not just as revved up about our primary mission in the world – to go and make disciples.   And I know we aren’t – because less than 5% of our churches are meaningfully reaching those without Christ.

Christmas Memories!

This time of year provokes some vivid memories for me of Christmas!  Excitement would run high as we got into December and my brother and I anticipated the cutting of the Christmas tree.  Daddy would get permission from a landowner who had wild cedar trees growing on his property to go and cut down a tree.  My brother and I usually both went.  We would look at trees - Daddy tended to cut down a larger tree and would then take the top out of it for our Christmas tree.  Even then, I can remember him drilling holes in the trunk and shoving in a limb or two to make it completely full when needed.  But the smell - a fresh cut cedar tree in the house is a wonderful scent. 

At some point very early in my life, Mom and Dad bought a full size Santa that they put on the front door. They also had two big lighted candles that went on either side of the door. Daddy would take left overs from the cedar tree and weave them in a strand of lights that went around the door to light the Santa!  For some reason, it was very exciting every year.  Here is a pic of me and my Mom in front of those decorations. 

At some point in my fairly young years, I started doing a "service" on Christmas eve, with Daddy's permission of course.  My oldest sister, Laura, could play the piano so we would sing a Christmas carol and then I would "preach" a little Christmas message.  I don't think I did this every year, but did do it  two or three years. I would arrange chairs in the living room like a church, though the couch was more comfortable and got the greatest use!  

On Christmas eve we all got to open one gift - a prelude to the early morning rush of opening presents Christmas day.  My Aunt Audrey always mailed a box of presents with gifts for each one of us.  She always sent some great and usually unexpected gifts - meaning they were wonderfully unique.  Somehow our Christmas eve opening of gifts pretty much became opening Aunt Audrey's presents. 

When Andrea and I got married we lucked out that her family always gathered and opened gifts on Christmas eve and my parents always had the grand opening on Christmas day.  So, except for 2009, when I was in the hospital recovering from open heart surgery on Dec. 25, I have spent every Christmas day of my life at my Mom and Dad's!  54 out of what will soon be 55 Christmas mornings!  

This year's Christmas will be the most difficult one of all those years!  Andrea's Dad was with us last Christmas and is in heaven for this one.  Wonderful for him, extremely sad for us.  My Dad is getting so much more pitiful than I thought he could, slipping more and more in and out of reality and growing weaker month after month.  All of the rich memories, made somewhat painful by current realities.  I will enjoy Christmas Eve and Christmas Day as I always do.  And I will pray that my children and grandchildren can make many wonderful and ongoing memories as Andrea and I have.  

And, I am beginning to experience the slight sadness of Christmas! I don't mean that I am down and out and depressed.  It is just life.  Things never stay the same and it is sad to see the family plans we have always kept begin to suffer somewhat.  We no longer have all the kids with us at Christmas. And part of our extended family are now fully in the twilight of life.  More changes are to come.  And I am so blessed to have had such a long and wonderful run making Christmas memories!  

 

The Mitchell Rules for Living!

As of late I have been thinking about my parents a good bit.  Daddy is in very poor health and confined to bed and Mother is worn out from caregiving.  Thinking about them and praying for them has caused me to think about what I would simply call "The Mitchell Rules for Living!"   These rules were not written down, but we learned them growing up - one way or the other!

1. Make up your bed!  We made our beds from the very early days of childhood.  It was just not acceptable to leave the bed unmade.  As we got a little older, it was just sort of an unwritten rule that you made your bed before you came to the table to eat breakfast!

2. Don't talk back! There was a very thin line between Mother and Daddy's perception of us making a reasoned argument or plea for more information and the crime of  talking back!  We tended not to make too many arguments or reasoned arguments because they were often perceived as talking back! 

3. Don't EVER talk back to Mother!  This was not a "Mother" induced rule, but a Daddy rule.  Life as we knew it was pretty close to over if Daddy ever heard us doing anything he considered as talking back to Mother!  We seldom crossed that line.

4. Don't lie! That rule was so severly enforced that we seldom ever thought of lying!  If we did, we knew it was with a very high risk of massive discomfort should we be found out!

5. Work hard!  Daddy and Mother modeled hard work at home and on the job.  I'm not saying they were slave drivers.  They just worked hard for our family.  They raised our food.  Mother sewed and made a lot of our clothes.  Money was tight.  They worked hard and provided for us.  We boys enjoyed tinkering around with Daddy on the cars, the lawn mowers etc..  All of us picked up on having a good work ethic.  I have worked at something since I was about 12.

6. Enjoy simple things!  It was sort of an unwritten rule.  There was not much technology as we were growing up - and we enjoyed a lot of simple things growing up.  Now tell me, how many readers of this post sat in lawn chairs and on the back steps in the back yard watching purple martins feed in the evening!  We Mitchell kids have!  But I would not take anything for it.  Purple Martins are an amazing bird to watch fly!  We raised gourds and helped put them on the poles for the birds to nest in.  It was a big deal seeing how many would return in the spring.   We had lots of these simple entertainment deals that cost nothing but provided great enjoyment, entertainment, and family time! (ok- now I am a bit tearful)   Other things- cranking the ice cream freezer, listening to WCPC on the stereo on Sunday night after church, or records, playing with the cats, and reading!

7. Love the Lord!  It was also a rule - sometimes stated and sometimes unstated! This was reflected in our church attendance and participation.  It was reflected in our being involved in choirs, crafts, revivals, and other opportunities.  I could never imagine not being involved in a church, whether or not my vocation was in ministry.  We enjoyed it all.  I have pictures of my sisters in GA coronation dresses.  That was a big deal back then.  I remember getting the new suit every year for Easter (we outgrew the previous year's most of the time). We loved going to church. And we loved the Lord.

I know there were more of these rules  - but these are foremost in my memory!

Marriage Tips for Men!!!!

It has been a while since I offered any marriage tips! So here is are a few for men that might help you out a bit!

1. SINCERELY tell your wife OFTEN that you love her!  Be sure that some of those times are not just when you are walking out the door on the way to work! Be intentional about it!

2. Surprise her with some cleaning!!!!  This may not be your thing, but every once in a while vacuum, mop, or dust (or all three) before she gets home from work - or while she is away buying groceries!  Women think that men doing housework without being asked is SEXY!

3. Offer her praise!  Bragging on a meal, her appearance, her hair, her clothes, her hard work etc.  will be a blessing to her!  It is a wise man indeed who learns early to appreciate and praise his wife!

4. Pray for / with your wife! She will be blessed! You will be blessed! And you will know and appreciate one another's struggles and victories!

5. Cook for her! 

6. Take her on a date - take her to eat - and / or - ask her what she would like to do one evening and then make it happen.

7. Hold her! Just hold her! Hug her! Tell her how much she means to you! If it is tough for you to come up with the words, keep trying! You will get better at it!

There are many more - but start out with these!  or come up with your own.  The key - love your wife in word and deed!

The Chirp!

At 6:10 this morning it started! Praise the Lord it didn't start before then!  And it is loud!  The CHIRP!  The battery in one of our smoke detectors, the one in the kitchen, is low and it is letting me know with an insistent CHIRP!  CHIRP!

How many 9 volt batteries do you keep in your house? CHIRP At this time we have NONE!  I don't know why it started at 6:10 am but I am so thankful it did not start at 11:00 pm last night or we would have had no sleep.  CHIRP All my detectors are wired together.  I am not sure what taking one battery out will do. Maybe nothing.  Maybe they all go off!  I don't really CHIRP want to know until I have new batteries on hand at lunch to put in them.  

CHIRP!  I am writing chirp everytime CHIRP it does it.  It is picking up in frequency!  There is CHIRP a sermon illustration in this somewhere.  Probably along the lines that this is like the warning you here in your head when you are about to do something wrong and you keep telling yourself not to! CHIRP

Heed the warning!  I've got to go find a battery before I go CHIRP crazy!

Don't Play in the Cesspool!

In my early childhood we lived in a church parsonage.  It had a fairly large back yard that endured a lot of play time from all of us kids.  One prominent feature of the backyard was the cesspool!  I guess you couldn't see it or smell it from the church, so it just seemed to perpetually be "our problem!"  It was there for a long time. 

A common instruction to us as we piled out the back door to play was, "now, you kids stay away from that cesspool!"  I suppose these days I am taking it for granted that people even know what a cesspool is.  Simply put - it is a watery bog, usually in a low place in the yard, directly above or very close to either the septic tank or the field line coming and going to the septic tank.  To put it more eloquently, it is a watery, smelly mess of liquid pee and poop that has broken through the top of the ground! 

Now, the cesspool was gross, but strangely alluring!  We went barefoot all summer. Sometimes while playing out in the yard we would dare each other to see how close we could get to the cesspool without getting in it!  Yep! Inevitably someone would step in it! And it was usually cool to cold.  On a hot summer day it smelled a bit more - but was a strangely fun feeling between your toes! So, sometimes we would just end up running through it - then heading for the water hose to wash off the feet.  

Gross, right?  When we were riding bikes, we would sometimes see if we could make it riding through the cesspool without getting stuck.  With enough speed you could do it. But it had been there so long that it almost had a quicksand component - so I got stuck on the bike more than a few times. 

Weird huh? A stinking smelly mess - gross actually - yet we could not stay away. Sounds familiar?

Sin is like the cesspool! It smells - it is stinky - it is not good for you - it is dangerous to your health and wellbeing - yet we are strangely attracted to it.  There is this perverse calling to sin.  Even when we fully know the dangers of playing around a dangerous mess, we seem to be even more drawn to it.   The only solution - remove the mess.

Eventually Daddy got tired of it - and like many a pastor - he got out in the backyard himself and dug up the field line by hand - installed a new one - and low and behold - the cesspool was gone!  

We could now ride bikes in forbidden territory.  We could now walk anywhere in the yard!  We could play outside without smelling sewage!  It was a new day - because the cesspool was gone.  

Are you playing in a cesspool today?  Or are you taking steps to remove it?   Remove it now! To do otherwise is dangerous to your spiritual health!

What to Do When You Don't Know What to Do!!!!!

Everyone has been there! It is a weird, frustrating, and often anxious time when you get to a point in your life when something is confronting you and your best thought is "I don't know what to do!"  Usually this admission comes after many other attempts "to do" something have already proven fruitless.  Concern, worry, and endless actions have left you wondering what to do.  And further thought finally brings you to the point of saying, "Hey! I don't know what to do!" 

The final part of this is that most often, something needs to happen. Which makes the circumstances all the more worrisome, troublesome, and difficult!

So, what do you do when you get to this point? What should we do when we reach this point?

Well, we could FRRRREEEEEAAAAAAKKKKKK OUT!   Been there?  I have! Probably will get to that point again some day!   But it doesn't really do much good other than to provide a temporary outlet to our emotions and frustrations.  What is a better thing to do when "we don't know what to do?"

1. Be thankful for the realization!  If you really can't do anything, then you can quit expending pointless energy!

2. Be prayerful!  Maybe the prayer is not "Lord, you have got to show me what to do!"  It may be that the prayer is "Lord, I don't know what to do - and until I hear from you - I am going to trust you to take care of it!"

3. Be Thoughtful! Perhaps the circumstance is not really on you!  Sometimes I get really distraught over things which I have zero ability to control!  Perhaps the "thing" that needs to be done is to let go of some impossible thing we have been attempting or for which we are bearing responsibility.

4. Be Available! If the Lord lays some responsibility on you or some action for you to do, then do it! If not, then move on!

5. Be Open!  In times of impossibility, the Lord may be trying to get us refocused on some opportunity or ministry that is totally different than the thing that has consumed us.  Perhaps the Lord has just let you run out of steam to reorient you to different opportunities, different thinking, and different actions.  Be open to all He may do.

Are any of these things easy? Not usually! We may FRRREEEEEAAAAAKKKKKK OUT between each one!  What say you????????